Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice
by CPDRuzekFan
Summary: A sequel of sorts to 'Little Boy Blue and The Man In The Moon'
1. Chapter 1

Hot.

It was the kind of heat the pulled the oxygen from your lungs and had you sweating in places you didn't thick could sweat. The AC in the house had taken yet another shit and the piece needed to repair it hadn't arrived yet.

They were left to suck it up and sweat it out.

It was not fun,

Sebastian didn't seem uncomfortable, of course being five years old and parading around in just his underwear probably helped. If only she could do the same, she couldn't, instead she continued to douse her face and the back of her neck with ice cold water every so often and it helped some.

They were in the throngs of one of the longest heat waves in Chicago's history and there was no sign it'd be letting up any time in the near future.

September wasn't supposed to be this hot.

"Watch mommy!" Sebastian hollered as he stood on the arm of the couch, "the floor is lava mommy, you can't step on it."

"Please don't stand on the couch like that." Kim motioned with her hand, "Why don't you come sit down and we can watch a movie." She suggested, beads of sweat running down her back, "you're making me even hotter with all your running around."

"Movies are boring." Sebastian sulked as he flopped back on the couch, "I want my daddy. He's fun."

Kim took a deep breath before speaking, "Your Daddy is working."

"Catchin' all the bad guys!" Sebastian beamed, "He is the bestest cop around.."

Kim poked him in the belly, "Hey!"

"Boy cop. He's the best boy cop and you're the best girl cop." Sebastian quickly amended his statement, "but you don't catch bad guys...you teach new cops to catch the bad guys. You're a teacher cop."

Kim had transferred out of the 21st shortly after Sebastian's surgery, she wasn't sure working with Adam was the best idea. It was pretty tense in the unit once Adam had learned that Upton had been in contact with Kim and told Halstead about it and then they both kept it from him it had become akin to a powder keg. Kim returning to the unit had the potential to be the spark that ignited it.

Though it didn't last long, Upton and Halstead started seeing each other and it was hot and heavy for a good bit before it blew up. Halstead was left reeling as yet another woman walked out on him. Clearly Haley Upton wasn't as put together as she liked everyone to think, she was a train wreck and destined to end in disaster.

Once Haley and Jay hooked up it wasn't long before the skeletons had tumbled from Upton's closet, and it was a bit jarring to learn just how many skeletons she had packed in. Upton had appointed herself the moral compass of the unit, she was quick to judge those who danced in the grey areas. It was shocking to learn that she had bedded numerous detectives, and left a string of broken marriages behind her. Now, she wasn't the only guilty party, she didn't force married men to fuck her, it was just a bit ironic. For someone who had a holier than thou air about her it was ironic that she wasn't as innocent as she wanted folks to believe. In fact she was a pretty shitty person who didn't care who she hurt as long as she got what she wanted.

Kim bounced around a bit before finding her footing as a field training officer, which quickly parlayed into teaching a few classes at the academy. Over the last two years she had been promoted and taken on a larger role at the academy and she truly enjoyed it. Though she missed the adrenaline rush that intelligence gave her, the flip side of that was that she worked more traditional hours. It wasn't quite a 9-5 gig but she had most of her weekends off and just one night class a week.

"Teacher cop" she chuckled that was the first time he had used that phrase and she loved it, "I'm a teacher cop so I can be your mommy."

Sebastian stood up and ran across the couch throwing himself at her, "and you're the best mommy! I love you so much" he wrapped his arms around her neck giving her a big squeeze.

Kim ran her hand across his clammy back, "I love you too baby. Can you loosen your grip a bit? I need to breathe."

He dropped his arms, "Sorry."

Kim checked the time, dinner time was still hours away. School was starting in two weeks and she needed to finish shopping, "How about we go finish school shopping and then dinner at Shake Shack? Does that sound good?" The mall had air conditioning.

"Clothes shopping?" Sebastian grumbled, "That's boring."

Kim headed down the hall, Sebastian was on her heels, she ruffled through the drawer handed him a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, "Get dressed. If you're a good boy we can stop in the toy store."

"Can I get a toy?" He was suddenly on board.

"Yes. You've got to be a good boy though. That mean listening to me, trying clothes on, and not wandering away."

"Got it." Sebastian was dressed in a flash.

Fuck.

His head throbbed and his eyes watered, the contents of his stomach sloshed around his gut with even the slightest movement. He had gone at it a little harder than he had planned on and he was now paying the price.

He was too old for this shit.

He had no choice though, this was his life now.

Adam kicked the sheet off and slowly began to sit up, if he was careful he could avoid throwing up.

The apartment was small, ridiculously small. It was laughable that they even referred to it as a one bedroom apartment.

It was more like a one room apartment, beside his small bedroom the bathroom was the only other real _room_ with its old as hell shitter and a shower stall. It was seedy and old as hell. He was shocked to find it had air conditioning, he'd be eternally grateful for that fact. His balls would've melted by now if it hadn't.

He had a small fridge and a couple of cabinets in what was generously labeled the kitchen, a hot plate sat to the right of the sink and a toaster to the left. He wasn't all that confident in his stomach's ability to keep food down, but he needed something. He opted for a few slices of toast, he would toss some jelly on it and call it a day. He couldn't help but think of his boy as he grabbed the jelly from the fridge, Sebastian lived on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

He missed his boy something fierce, he hated being away from him. It was hard to believe in just a few weeks he would start school. It felt like just yesterday that he was changing his diapers and all that went with a baby and then he blinked and he had a five year old.

He could feel himself start to slip, he quickly pushed those thoughts from his head. Nothing good would come from thinking about his son.

Just as he was stepping in the shower he heard his phone, he turned off the water and grabbed it.

' _We still on for tonight? I certainly hope so_ '

He groaned as the message came through, he had hoped to lay low for the day. He kicked a few replies around in his head before settling on one.

' _Does a fat baby sweat?'_

He tossed the phone back on the bed and made his way to the bathroom.

The salesman was clearly growing tired of them, Kim pointed to another pair, "What about these ones buddy?" She showed him the grey sneakers with the black swoosh, "I bet these will help you run fast."

Sebastian pulled the display down turning the sneaker over in his hands as he studied it, "Nope."

Kim groaned she too was growing tired of the entire process, "They are cool bud. You need to pick a pair honey, or I will." She told him, "You've made this nice man grab dozens of boxes. We will buy a pair from him, either you pick them or I will. Either way you're getting sneakers."

Sebastian's shoulders slumped as he sulked, he dropped down to sit on the floor, "I want black ones. Black sneakers and silver swooshes. Just like my daddy's. Those are what I want. Not these stupid ones."

"Sebastian.." Kim was prepared to scold him for his attitude but stopped mid sentence when the salesman crouched down in front of Sebastian.

"Your daddy's got Nike's?" He asked him.

Sebastian nodded his head, "Cool ones. I want the same."

"Okay. Let's go look at the men's sneakers, do you think you could show me the ones your dad has?"

"Yeah!" Sebastian jumped up and took the teenaged salesman's hand.

Kim blew out a exasperated breath, "Okay then.."

Sebastian walked the length of the display wall he tapped his index finger against his chin as he looked at the wall of sneakers, he suddenly stopped on a dime, "This one. Daddy has this kind! He can run so fast in them!"

"Alright, good job pal." He was relieved, "Let's go to the computer and see if we can't find them or something similar in your size."

"Thank you..." Kim smiled, she read his name tag, "...Dylan. Thank you so much. I'm sorry this has taken forty forevers."

"No worries. I'm here no matter what" he laughed, "I will gladly help out a little dude find the freshest pair of sneakers. You gotta start them young."

After a few keystrokes he found the exact style in children's sizes, "I've got them." He turned the screen so Sebastian could see them, "Do you like these?"

Sebastian stood on his tiptoes to see, "They're just like my daddy's! Can I get them?"

"Yes!" Kim tousled his hair, "Can you ship them?" She looked to Dylan.

"Absolutely."

Kim was relieved to have finally finished school shopping, she wasn't ready for Sebastian go but at least now he had new clothes to wear. She still needed to tackle the list of supplies she had received from his teacher, she was dreading that shopping trip. Her baby boy was growing up and it was bittersweet.

He had been such a good boy and had been a trooper for most of the afternoon, he had tried her patience a bit at the sneaker store but he had earned his prize. They grabbed a quick meal from Shake Shack and made their way towards the toy store.

Sebastian charged through the front door, "Aunt Coley! It's me, Sebastian!" He hollered, his voice echoing off the marbled floor. Life had been good to Nicole over the last few years, she had found love again.

She loved the nickname her nephew had bestowed upon her, she smiled broadly at the sound of his voice. Nicole dropped the towel on the kitchen island and welcomed her nephew into her arms, "Hey baby.." she kissed his head. "Where's mom?"

Sebastian wiggled free from her arms, "She's coming, she's a slow poke." He climbed on the stool, "Where's Mikey?"

"Napping." Nicole told him, "He should be up soon." Mikey had been a surprise, Nicole had struggled with infertility for so long that she never gave birth control a second thought. Once she and Michael became committed each and their relationship became serious they stopped using condoms.

Learning she was pregnant had shocked the shit out of her but she and Michael embraced it, and it wasn't long before they were married. It happened fast, but it had felt right. The first time Nicole had met Michael she felt drawn to him, she felt safe with him.

She had struggled for so long after her divorce and rape that she never even considered dating again, she was happy to just be alive. Meeting Michael had definitely blindsided her a bit, he was everything she didn't know she needed. He had an outstanding job, and they lived the good life with a beautiful home and their perfect little family.

Zoe adored Michael and she was smitten with her baby brother, Mikey was two years old and an absolute joy.

"Thanks for waiting buddy." Kim blew out an exhausted breath, "Where's my nephew?"

Nicole laughed, "No one comes to see me anymore, huh? Mikey is napping ." She handed Sebastian a bottle of water, "but you can go see if he's awake."

"Okay!" Sebastian took off upstairs.

"How's he doing?" Nicole asked.

Kim shrugged as she sat at the island, watching Nicole as she prepared dinner, "He's okay. He misses his dad but aside from that he's hanging in."

"And you?"

Kim laughed, "I'm a mess. My baby is starting school soon and I'm so not ready." She gratefully accepted the bottle of water her sister offered, "I feel like we were celebrating his first birthday just yesterday. I wish time would slow down."

"I get it, Zoe is rarely home, she's off to college in just a few years. Mikey is growing like a weed. It's all happening so quickly."

"How are things on the Adam front?"

Kim sighed heavily, "I don't know. I haven't heard from him in a while."

"He doesn't check in on Sebastian?" Nicole questioned.

"Occasionally he does, but he can never talk long that's if he calls. More often than not he just sends a text." Kim explained.

"I'm sorry." Nicole patted her hand.

"Me too." Kim smiled sadly.

"Hey.." he greeted her with a kiss on the cheek, "I'm a bit surprised you wanted to me to come here." He had just pulled into the bar's parking lot when he got her text, "you could've sent it a little earlier, I was already at the bar."

"Ah..I'm sorry." She stepped aside allowing him into the living room, "I wanted some privacy. I'm tired of sharing you."

Adam glanced around the room, "Nice place. You've got a great view of the water." He leaned against the wall, "a short walk to the park." He couldn't help but think of Sebastian, his boy would lose his mind if he lived this close to a park _and_ a lake.

"It's not too shabby. Though, it can get kinda loud. You would be surprised at how far the brats voices can travel, good thing they'll be in school soon."

Adam moved away from the window, taking a seat on the couch, "I thought tonight was the night I met your friends? I'm not complaining about the company.." he smirked as she waltzed over towards him, "I just thought..."

She straddled him, looping her arms around his neck, "In due time..baby..due time."

Adam grabbed her hips, "Babe...I like what we've got going on, I like you..."

She placed her index finger against his lips, "Shhh..." she kissed his neck, "I liked you..." she couldn't resist one last kiss.

Adam felt his blood run cold.

"Do you think I'm an idiot?" She asked him as she got up from his lap, "That I didn't know what you wanted? You're not the first to use me to get to my father" She whistled, "You were careless" She took a few steps backwards and smiled as the front door opened and in walked four guys.

Four big fucking guys.

"Fuck..." Adam mumbled.


	2. Some Dumb Fucker

"Fuck is right." She sneered, "I've got to be honest I didn't think it'd be so easy to get you here."

Sage Mancini was used to having guys use her to get to her father Vincent, typically they wanted to work for him, never had it been to bring him down. She would've love to take credit for piecing this together, for figuring out that the man before her wasn't who he said he was. Nope that honor belonged to her cousin Dante, he had felt uneasy when Sage introduced him to the new man in her life, something didn't sit right with him. When Dante had a ' _feeling_ ' he put his head down and got to work, growing up in the business had taught him to follow his gut, to trust his instincts.

She had known for a weeks now, tonight was the culmination of weeks of planning.

" _What now Dante?" Sage was slightly annoyed, Dante had been cryptic on the phone. He demanded she meet up at her father's house but he didn't tell her why. She had the right mind to tell him to fuck off, but she knew that wouldn't deter him. It was best to just go and listen to what he had to say._

" _The dick you're parading around with the last few weeks.."_

" _Danny?"_

" _Yeah. 'Danny'." He rolled his eyes at the mention of his name, "He's 5-0. He's a fucking copper."_

" _That's funny." Sage pushed past him, "He's not a cop, he's a mechanic. He works at the bike shop near Wrigley Field. Is that all you wanted? I have plans."_

" _Plans with the copper? His name isn't Danny, it's Adam Ruzek. I've got proof." He knew it wasn't going to be easy and that she'd need more than just a 'feeling' he held a file up, "I've got proof." He shoved it at her, "Open! Look at the photos. You need to tell him to kick rocks."_

" _Fuck you Dante." She glared at him, "You're not my fucking father."_

" _Thank fuck for that. He's after our family. I won't let him get to Uncle Vincent, I will do whatever it takes." Dante worked closely with her father, he was the son Vincent never had but wanted desperately._

 _She massaged her temples, "Just give me a few hours." This has been a kick to the stomach, she really liked Danny and to learn that she had been played for a fool hurt._

"You got me." Adam shrugged, "Listen, I haven't told my boss anything yet. We can come to an understanding, baby. You and me? We are meant to be."

Sage laughed wickedly, "That's Funny...Dante, did you hear that?" She looked to her cousin for affirmation.

Dante nodded, "I did."

"You're hot as hell, you've got that going for you. I gotta be honest I'm a little sad we haven't fucked. I gotta say it baffled me at first. You were all hot and heavy and then nothing...it's almost kind of sweet if you think about it, you didn't want to fuck me because of your wife, your loss though. The things I can do with my mouth..."

Adam laughed at her, "I don't have a wife." He didn't give two shits that his cover was blown he could handle it, he didn't want them knowing about Kim or Sebastian.

"Yes. You do." Sage replied, "A kid too. He's a cutie that's for sure." She pulled a small photo of Sebastian from her bra, "He looks like you."

He thought about telling them that it wasn't his kid but it was pointless. His worst fears had come to fruition, they knew everything about him. Adam got in her face, "Are you threatening me?"

Dante motioned to his guys, "Go." He watched as the pair grabbed Adam and slammed him backwards and down to the floor, "Ouch..." he laughed, "Damn..that had to hurt."

Adam groaned, he heard a sickening crack as he hit the ground, blood gushed from his nose as he caught an elbow to his face, his vision was blurry and he was a bit dazed.

"I assure you it wasn't a threat. I'd like to call it a promise." Dante kicked him in the side, "No need to worry about them at the moment, you're the one we want."

Adam did his best to spit out the blood that had filled his mouth, "Fuck...you..." he struggled to speak, the blood poured down the back of his throat, he sputtered a bit as he spoke. Breathing was difficult, speaking was almost impossible.

Nicole studied Kim as she watched television, her sister was worried. Her brow was furrowed and she was nervously chewing on her bottom lip.

She reached across the couch and nudged her, "Hey..are you okay? You look a million miles away."

"I am." Kim sighed softly, "I'm worried."

"About Adam?"

"About everything. Adam. Sebastian starting school, this one.." she rubbed her hand over her baby bump, "This little one is due in about six weeks and that alone is enough to terrify me, throw in that I don't know when Adam will be home, they no longer have a time frame.." she sighed, "..I don't want to lose myself again.." she admitted.

Getting pregnant again hadn't been an easy decision, it had been a bit of a fight to be honest. Kim had wanted it more than anything but Adam had no desire to have another child he was quick to tell her as much.

 _The sun started to filter in, Kim rolled over on to her side and watched as Adam slept. The sun's rays danced across his face, it was then she noticed a fresh cut to his cheek, and it had required stitches. Kim lightly ran her fingers over it. He had obviously had a bit of a rough night, part of her wanted to let him sleep but she had missed him beyond words, she also knew it was just a matter of time before Sebastian woke up._

 _Once Sebastian discovered Adam was home, all bets were off and she didn't stand a chance. Sebastian would demand all of Adam's attention. Luckily she loved watching her boys together, Sebastian was definitely Adam's shadow. Her favorite was when the pair cuddled up together on the couch to watch cartoons and they'd both be sound asleep within the first half hour._

 _She set about waking him up, and she used her tried and true method to do it. She kissed her way down his torso, her hand slipping beneath the covers. Her fingers had barely grazed him and he was already beginning to respond to her touch, it never took much to get him excited._

 _Adam grabbed her hips as she climbed on top of him, "Hey baby..." his voice a mixture of exhaustion and desire, "you're up early..." he smiled, "Not that I'm complaining at all..."_

" _Who hit my baby.." she leaned down to kiss his cheek._

" _Some dumb fucker." Adam had taken a nasty sucker punch, "he caught me by surprise. I don't wanna talk about that though.." he pulled her back down for another kiss._

 _They had a lot of catching up to do and none of it required talking._

 _Kim lay her head on his chest, "that was exhilarating."_

" _Indeed it was. You can wake me up like that everyday." Adam laughed._

" _Don't bet on it," Kim teased, "I just really missed you. I know it's only been a few days but I hated it."_

" _I know." Adam ran his hand down her back, "I've got the next few days off. Getting punched in the face has its perks." Any visit to the emergency room resulted in at least two days off._

 _She slapped his chest, "Stop it. Don't say that. There is nothing good about getting hurt. What if he had a gun?" She shuddered at the thought of it._

" _He didn't." Adam replied._

 _Kim sat up clutching the sheets to her chest, "Adam..." He was always so flippant about it and she knew he took risks, she also knew nothing she said would change the way he approached the job, didn't mean she wouldn't tell him to be more careful._

 _Sebastian's cries rang out over the monitor, "Ah, my boy is up." Adam practically jumped out of bed, "I will grab him." He threw on a pair of shorts and went to retrieve his son._

 _Kim listened intently to their conversation, Sebastian had started talking within the last months or so, it was still a bit tricky to understand everything he was saying but it was adorable to listen to._

 _Right now Adam was carrying on much of the conversation. It was pretty cute when Sebastian spotted Adam, he was absolutely giddy._

" _Dada...dada...dada.." Sebastian squealed, Kim didn't to be in the room to know he'd be smiling from ear to ear and jumping up and down._

 _That boy loved his daddy._

 _For a morning that started off with such promise it had gone downhill pretty quickly._

 _They cuddled on the couch as Sebastian played, he was having the time of his life. He would build a tower out of his blocks and then kick it down, squealing with delight as he did so._

 _Kim turned so she could face Adam, "Let's have another baby." Sebastian was two and the light of their lives, "Let's give Sebby a baby brother or sister."_

" _No." Adam replied, "No way."_

 _Kim felt him tense up, "No?"_

" _No." Adam wiggled out from beneath her and stomped into the kitchen._

 _Kim followed him, "No? Why not?" She leaned against the island, watching as he pilfered through the snack drawer, "Sebastian is two. I've got a great work schedule. We always talked about having multiple children."_

 _Adam closed his eyes briefly before responding, "I can't go through that again. I won't go through that again."_

" _You didn't go through it, I did." She regretted it the second it came out of her mouth. She knew it pissed Adam off, "I am sorry."_

" _I went through hell. I can't do it again, I can't lose you. Sebastian can't lose you." His tone softened and he pulled her by the hand towards him, "Our family is perfect. Me, you, and our boy."_

" _You don't want more children? We've always talked about having multiple children, having them two, three years apart would be perfect." Kim had worshipped the ground Nicole walked on when they were younger, she wanted that for Sebastian. She wanted him to always have someone who would love him unconditionally, someone that he would have in life once she and Adam had died._

" _No, I don't want more kids." Adam grabbed a bag of chips from the counter, "Our boy is perfect. So no, I don't want more. Not when postpartum depression almost broke us." Adam told her._

" _So that's it?"_

 _He groaned, "It's my first day off in days, can we not discuss it. I've missed you. I've missed my boy." He enveloped her in a tight hug._

" _Okay." Kim relented, she placed her hands on his chest, "Okay. I will let it go." She understood all of his concerns, she had them as well. How could she not? Things had changed for her though. She was still heavily involved in her support groups and while she wasn't currently in counseling the second she became pregnant she would be, she would be proactive. She knew what to look out for, she knew how to ask for help. She was still an advocate for women dealing with postpartum depression. She knew she could do this, she wanted to do it. She needed to do it._

 _She longed for another baby, she had missed out on so much of Sebastian first year, she wanted that experience. She wanted to enjoy having a newborn in her house._

 _She didn't want to live in fear of postpartum, it had already stolen so much from her, from all of them._

 _Kim knew she needed to let it go._

 _For now._

"Kim, honey. I know telling you not to worry is pointless so I will refrain. You can't dwell on the what ifs, take it one day at a time. You talk to Adam and if he's still not home, talk to me. If you feel yourself slipping, you need to reach out. You ask for help."

Kim used her thumb to flick away her tears, "Thank you. I'm all over the place lately. My hormones are all jacked up, just ignore me and my crying."

"No. Absolutely not." Nicole told her, "it's okay to be scared, but you can't live your life scared. Kim."

"I'll take this thanks." Dante grabbed Adam's cell phone, he dropped it on the floor before stomping on it, "You've pissed me off, not only are you trying to bring my uncle down, you're fucking with my cousin's head."

"Shut up Dante!" Sage shouted at him. The last thing she wanted the prick to know was that he got to her, that he got under her skin. They'd been meeting up for a few weeks and she enjoyed his company. He was funny as hell and easy on the eyes, he seemed to know who her father was but he didn't make a big deal out of it. He hadn't talked about him or asked to meet him . Clearly she had misjudged him on that front, he did care. He was working her and she had been none the wiser, he had played her for a fool.

Once Dante had come to her with what he found out it all started to make sense, she had been growing frustrated with him. They'd had gotten pretty hot and heavy a few times only for him to slam on the brakes and leave.

Now she knew why, he was married but what stung a bit more was that he was using her. She wasn't a saint and had tangled with a few married men in her time, it was the fact that he was using her that had lit her fire.

"He didn't fuck with my head..." Sage declared, "He was just a bit of fun."

Adam squirmed underneath Dante's foot as he buried it into his back, Adam had flipped over in a move of a self preservation not that it was working, the pain only intensified, "You're fucked..you both are." He mumbled, the blood was still pouring from his nose, they had worked him over pretty good, he feared he had at least one broken rib to go with his broken nose.

Dante looked around the room, "Funny, it seems you're the only whose fucked." He laughed, "I've got my boys with me and you? You my friend are all alone. So please tell me how in the hell we are the ones who are fucked."

Sage moved to sit beside Adam on the floor, "You were good, I'll give you that. You almost had me." She stroked his cheek, "you got sloppy.."

Adam tried to pull away from her touch, it was fruitless. It lead to Dante applying more pressure to his back and the pain intensified.

"You left your phone out." He had left it on the bar one night while he went to the restroom, it was just a few days after Dante dropped the bomb on her. She was shocked that he had left it behind and that it wasn't locked, for a split second she was almost positive Dante had been wrong. She scrolled through his photos, and nothing really stood out, there was a photo of a spider in its web, a few of shots of motorcycles, it was the last photo that stunned her. In that instant she knew Dante was right, it was a photograph of a little boy and a woman, a pregnant woman. She grabbed her own phone and took a photo of the screen.

"I can't believe you were that stupid, it was your kid and wife. She's gotta be due soon, yeah?" Sage stood up, "It's a little sad that baby won't ever know you." She gave him one last look before leaving the room. "Do what you need to do Dante."

Adam focused on his breathing, the pain that tore through him each time he inhaled was intense, exhaling was a thousand times worse. He needed to keep it together, he couldn't react to their threats, he was in no position to pop off at the mouth.

"Let's go..." He was amped up, the adrenaline coursing throughout his body was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. They had never taken part in something as big as this, the stakes were high.

"You good?" He looked him dead in the eyes, "Can I trust you?"

"Absolutely."

"Talk to me..." Nicole nudged Kim's arm lightly, "you look a thousand miles away right now."

Kim smiled, "I was. Kind of." She propped her feet up on the coffee table, "I was thinking about Adam and the night he told me he was ready to try for another baby." She felt her eyes tear up, she ran her hand over her belly, "I miss my husband."

"Do you wanna tell me about it?" Nicole had already convinced her to spend the night, Sebastian had fallen asleep hours ago.

Kim suddenly sat up, "I haven't told you?"

She looked puzzled, "Nope. You haven't." Nicole laughed, "I'd love to hear it, if you want to share. I understand if you don't want to tell me. I get it. It's a personal subject."

"As if we don't share everything." Kim laughed, "It was after your baby shower." She would never forget that moment.

" _Well I think he's finally down for the count." Kim announced, "I had to snuggle him until his eyes got sleepy.." she positioned herself between Adam's legs, "what're you watching? I recorded a few movies, we should pick one." She wrapped her arms around him and tucked her head under his chin, it was her favorite place to be._

 _Adam sat up a bit, "Actually I was hoping we could talk."_

 _Kim sat upright, "What's wrong?"_

 _Adam waved his hand dismissively, "Nothing. Why does something have to be wrong?" He asked her, "Don't panic."_

" _You ask to talk and expect me not to panic, do you not know me at all, Adam?" She laughed nervously. "Panicking is my speciality."_

" _I've been thinking..." Adam bounced the remote between his hands as he spoke "...a lot over the last few days but today? Today kind of sealed the deal."_

 _Kim grabbed the remote from him, "Between you and Sebastian we have replaced this damn thing far too many times." She knew his constant fidgeting meant he was nervous and that had her on edge. She placed the remote on the coffee table, "Can you just tell me?"_

 _Adam grabbed her hands, "Today..." he paused to gather his thoughts, "...I watched you, your eyes? That were dancing. You were downright giddy, it was pretty fucking cute. You were in your element."_

" _Today was fun, I enjoyed it." Kim told him, "I'm thrilled for my sister. She is the happiest I have seen her in a very long time."_

" _So are you. Kim, I'm scared..." he admitted, "...I'm terrified that history will repeat itself. I can't go through that again, it nearly broke me...but...Seeing you today.."_

" _What are you saying?" Kim interrupted him._

 _._

 _Adam moved his hand to her face, "I'm saying I want to have another baby. I want to give Sebastian a little sister or brother. I want to watch you grow our baby."_

" _Adam..." Kim grabbed his hand, "are you sure? I know you're scared. I am too, I don't want to have postpartum depression again, but I don't want that to stop us."_

" _I just need you to promise you'll talk to me. I'm going to do better, I will make sure I'm home more, I just need you to be honest with me. Let me help you." He felt like he was begging her, he knew he wanted another baby just as much as she did, he always had. It was just this overwhelming fear holding him back._

" _Absolutely, Adam."_

 _Adam pulled her into his lap, "I loved watching you today, the way your face lit up at the mere mention of a baby, then your sister's friend showed up with her baby..." he had stopped in his tracks when he saw the infant in Kim's arms, "...you were drawn to it..to her. Then you were holding her and I was done, I knew in that minute that I wanted to have another baby, that the risk was worth the reward. I want us to have a baby." Adam kissed her, "Darlin'..we missed out on so much when Sebastian was a baby...I want us to have that."_

 _Kim was overcome with emotion, "I'm sorry..." she cried, "I'm so sorry..."_

" _Stop. It wasn't your fault. I didn't mean to upset you.." he kissed her again before wiping her tears away, "I love you. You're an amazing mother to our son, he absolutely adores you."_

" _He's pretty amazing..."_

 _Adam smirked, "He gets it honest, he takes after his daddy." He teased, "I hope our next one is just as perfect."_

" _It will be..." Kim silenced him with a kiss._

"Wow, Kim that's awesome." Nicole replied, "It seems like just yesterday. It goes so fast. Mikey is two years old, and now my new niece or nephew will be here in a matter of weeks. Sometimes I wish you could make time slow down, set your life to play out in slow motion..."

"I wish I could hit fast forward. I'd fast forward to the end of Adam's UC case." Kim laughed, "Ugh..it's been seven weeks. They thought they'd have it done in two."

"I'm sorry." Nicole rubbed her arm, "Do you know why it's taken so long?"

"No. It could be any number of reasons." She knew precious little about the case and she knew that was for the best, the more people that knew the riskier it was for Adam, it just sucked. "I try not to worry..but you know what I'm like. I worry about worrying, I'm my own worst enemy sometimes."

"You know what?" Nicole clapped her hands together, "I say we get a baby sitter for Mikey and Sebastian and we have a spa day. Get massages, maybe grab brunch or something. Just have a day of being pampered."

Kim nodded her head, "That sounds amazing."

"It does, doesn't it? I'm definitely the smarter sister." She teased, "I'm gonna head to bed, are you good?"

"Yeah. I'm exhausted. Thanks again Nicole, this was nice."

He was disoriented.

It was chaotic and his ears were still ringing.

What the fuck had happened?


	3. We Can Get A Little Saucy

_They had busted their asses for the last week, pulling together all the intel they could get their hands on, they had reached out to VICE and Organized Crime. They had one chance at this, one chance to bring down one of Chicago's biggest crime bosses. Only one of them would go under, the goal was to get close to the family, using any means necessary._

 _Voight hadn't come to this decision lightly, in fact he agonized over it. He knew it wasn't ideal but it was their best shot. He understood his apprehension, he wasn't heartless but he had to be the one to do this._

 _Halstead wasn't a viable option, he screamed cop. He was too clean cut, he was the stereotypical all American hero._

 _Atwater would stick out like a sore thumb, his massive frame and booming voice would make him memorable._

 _They needed someone who could blend in, someone who could befriend anyone in the room._

 _Adam was their guy._

" _Ruzek, my office please." Voight poked his head out into the bullpen, "Everyone else take a fifteen." He could hear their chairs scrape against the floor as they pushed back from their desks._

" _What's up?" Adam stood in the doorway._

" _Come in. Sit down." Voight ordered. "How is Kim?" It was a ridiculous question and he wasn't sure why he asked about Kim._

" _She's good." Adam replied._

" _I need you on this one." Voight jumped right in, "We've already put the wheels in motion." He pulled a file from his desk, "here's your identity, you need to go downstairs and get your phone. You'll leave Monday."_

 _Adam thumbed through it, "Seriously?"_

" _Adam, if there was another way I'd be all over it."_

 _Adam ran his hand though his hair, "Halstead?"_

" _Halstead won't work. They'll make him as cop from a mile away." Voight told, "Atwater won't work either. That leaves you."_

 _He groaned, "How long?"_

" _Two weeks. Maybe three." Voight told him, "Kim...she's what six months along?"_

" _Yeah. Give or take a week or so," Adam replied, "I need to be here for her. She needs me. I need to be there."_

" _I need you to do this Adam."_

 _Adam stood up, he felt sick to his stomach, "Boss.."_

 _Hank stopped him, "I understand your concerns, it's weighed heavily on my mind the last few days. This is our best shot, you're our best shot. I trust you to get this done." He paused briefly, "I need you to do this."_

" _Fuck..." Adam muttered, "I will do it." He knew he didn't have much of a choice. He could tell him no, but that wouldn't go over well at all, and he'd be hit with insubordination and kicked to patrol. "Can I ask you a favor?"_

" _What?"_

" _You'll find a way to get me out if Kim needs me. Don't let her twist in the wind, Boss. If she needs me, you need to pull me out." Adam sat back down, "if you can promise me that..I'm all in."_

" _Done."_

Adam wasn't sure how Kim would take the news that he would be going undercover. She handled it surprisingly well, she knew it was an important case. She also trusted Adam's ability as a police officer, he was a damn good cop and she knew he'd get the job done. She also had faith in his team, they'd have his back. She didn't want him to worry about her, she need him focused on the task at hand, she needed him to come home to her.

The morning he left was hard for them all.

" _Thank you for last night..." Adam lay on his side, "...and for earlier.." he dipped down for a long slow kiss, "I am going to miss you."_

" _I am going to miss you so much, it's not even funny." Kim was dreading the moment he had to walk out the door. They had spent the weekend together, just the three of them. Nothing was off limits, Sebastian had ice cream for breakfast and stayed up way past his bedtime. The only time Sebastian was told no, was when he asked to sleep in their bed, that wasn't going to happen. Adam had promised he was welcome in their room as soon as the sun woke up._

" _We had an amazing weekend, didn't we?" Adam kept his hand on her hip, "A lot of laughs, our son is the coolest little dude, and I can't wait to meet this one." He kissed her belly._

" _Promise me you'll be careful Adam, don't worry about me and Sebastian. We will have plenty of people looking after us, between your dad and my sister and then toss in Platt, Kevin, and Al. We will be fine." It was going to drive her crazy some days, "I just need you to be safe."_

" _Always." Adam moved in for yet another kiss, "I won't stop worrying about you though...you're always on my mind. You. Sebastian. This new baby" he tickled her stomach, "are my world."_

" _You're ours, Adam. This case is going to go by the book and you'll be home before you know it."_

" _I certainly hope so." Adam hoped to hell she was right, "I didn't want to do it. I don't want to leave you.."_

" _Stop..this is your job. You love going undercover." Kim told him, "I know you're worried about me...You'll be home before the baby is born, you'll be at my side every step of the way, postpartum depression won't happen but if it does, I will have you at my side. We will face it together."_

" _I love you..." Adam was filled with immense pride, "I am so proud of you..everything you have done, you're the strongest person I know."_

" _You are the strongest person I know...you're the reason I'm strong." Kim pulled him against her body as best she could, her very pregnant state had made it a bit difficult, "Sebastian is going to come charging through that door any moment now..."_

" _So let's get busy.." Adam smirked._

 _She hadn't been far off the mark, Sebastian had knocked on the door not long after that. Thankfully they had completed their task and Adam had already showered and gotten dressed. He had managed to convince Sebastian to help him prepare breakfast, giving Kim a few moments of peace and quiet._

 _Kim stood unnoticed in the doorway, watching her boys work. She adored the relationship Adam and Sebastian had, Sebastian wanted to be wherever his daddy was. If Adam liked it, Sebastian did as well, if Adam didn't like something it was a sure bet that Sebastian wouldn't._

" _How long daddy?" Sebastian sat on the island as Adam tended to the bacon on the griddle, "lots of days and nights?"_

" _I think so." Adam told him, "Remember we talked about this, I need to go undercover.."_

" _Pretending! Like on a tv show," Sebastian announced._

" _Yes. Like on a tv show," It had been one of the easiest ways they could come up to explain it when they talked to Sebastian about what was happening, "I am going to help arrest some really bad people, and I've got to pretend to be a bad guy..."_

" _You're a good guy, daddy, you're not bad!" Sebastian responded with a scowl, "You're good not bad! I don't like pretend."_

 _Adam turned the temperature on the griddle down and jumped up on the island to sit beside Sebastian, "I know it stinks, bud. I don't want to pretend to be a bad guy, I don't like it at all. I do it because it's important, if they think I'm a bad guy they will tell me things. Things that will help me to arrest them."_

" _Then they go to jail?"_

" _Yes, that's the plan."_

" _You won't go to jail, right? I don't want you to go to jail."_

 _Adam's heart broke when Sebastian's lip quivered, "I am not going to jail. The police will know I'm pretending. Hank, Al, Kevin, and Jay will know I'm pretending. They'll tell the other cops. I will be okay, I promise."_

 _Sebastian climbed into his lap, "Can I FaceTime with you? Like when you work at night? You always FaceTime before I go to sleep."_

" _I can't." Adam kissed the crown of his head, "I won't be able to call you, the bad guys might find out and then they won't believe that I'm a bad guy too. They need to think I'm bad."_

" _I don't know about this daddy.." Sebastian sighed heavily, "I don't think it's a good idea. Tell them you can't go."_

 _Kim couldn't stay quiet any longer, "Sweetie, daddy has to go. He's really good at pretending. He is going to catch the bad guys and come home to us as soon as he can." She ran her hand through his hair, "I know it's a little scary, I'm scared for daddy too and that's okay." She looked Adam in the eyes, "but I trust daddy though, I know he is a really good cop, and he's going to be okay."_

" _Are you sure?"_

" _I am." Kim smiled._

" _Sebastian, do you think you could do something for me?" Adam asked him._

" _What?" Sebastian was suddenly excited._

" _I need you to take really good care of mommy. She's going to need help while I'm gone, do you think you can help her?"_

" _Yes!" Sebastian jumped down from the island, "I can help with lots of things. I'm a good helper."_

" _That's great news." Adam pretended to be relieved, "You need to remind mommy to slow down and let Aunt Coley help her, she needs to let Grandpa Bob and GG help her. I know you'll help mommy by being a good boy."_

" _I will daddy," Sebastian had a hold of Kim's hand, "You'll come back before the baby comes out?"_

" _Yes." Adam was quick to respond._

Sleep didn't seem to be in the cards for her this evening, sadly it wasn't all that uncommon for her as of late. She was growing increasingly uncomfortable, but it wasn't the baby bump that kept her up at night. It was thoughts of Adam that kept her awake, during the day she kept herself busy but once Sebastian was in bed all bets were off.

Adam was all she could think about. She wondered where he was, what he was doing. If he was eating right, if he was getting enough sleep. She was caught in this vicious cycle of imagining all the ways the case could go wrong.

They never expected it to drag on for so long, it was a bit worrisome as one month became two, but everyone assured her Adam was fine. He was just taking his time, getting it right. She knew that cases like Adam's could take longer than anticipated, it often meant they were working on making the case airtight. She also knew that it could be that his cover wasn't working and that scared her, if they had even the slightest hint that he wasn't who he said he was it could be life threatening.

She pushed those thoughts from her head, she ran her hands over her belly choosing instead to focus on the good in her life. She had plenty of good going for her despite Adam's absence. They had beaten the odds and found their way back to each other. They had a beautiful healthy son who brought so much joy to those around him, and they had created another perfect little life whom she couldn't wait to meet.

They had decided early in her pregnancy that they didn't want to know the gender of the baby until it's birth. They had decided to be surprised when she was pregnant with Sebastian, only for Adam to figure it out during an ultrasound. They were just a few weeks from delivering and hadn't yet discovered it, Kim had her suspicions but she kept them to herself.

Sebastian was hoping for a boy, but had mentioned that he'd be okay with a girl, cause that meant he wouldn't have to share his toys.

Adam was hoping for a girl, while Kim didn't really care one way or the other, though she loved the idea of another son.

More than anything she wanted a healthy baby, she had asked about the odds of this baby suffering from pyloric stenosis like Sebastian had, they assured her the chances were low, that once the baby was born they would monitor it closely.

A soft knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts, "Mommy?" He stuck his head in, "Can I come snuggle with you?" His hair pointed in a thousand different directions.

"Of course you can." She pulled back the light blanket, "hop up." She welcomed him into her arms, "did you have a bad dream?"

"No." Sebastian poked her belly with his finger, "I just woke up and then I wanted daddy."

"I want daddy too." Kim kissed his head, "you should be sleeping."

He curled up beside her, "You're not sleeping."

Kim laughed, "I wish I was."

"Aunt Coley's house is too quiet, it's not like ours. Ours is loud. We can hear the cars and trucks, I can't hear cars or trucks here, I like loud better than quiet." Sebastian explained, "Do you think daddy is sleeping?"

"We live in the city, this isn't the city, that's why it's quiet." Kim had struggled with the quiet as well, "I like loud too." She kissed Sebastian's forehead as he laid against her.

The voices were familiar, the ringing in his ears made it almost impossible to understand what was being said to him.

"Calm down bro.." he pinned his arms down, "it's me man, relax." He had made it known to all what his intentions were, as soon as the job was done he had one priority.

"No!" He mumbled, "I'm.." he struggled to breathe, "...cop..."

"Ruz, it's me." Kevin told him, "You did it man. It's over."

Recently, Adam had become concerned that his cover might have been compromised, Sage had backed off a bit, there had been a shift in her demeanor and while he couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was, it had his hackles up. He had fired off a quick email to Olinsky with his concerns.

 _He had taken the back roads and was keenly aware of his surroundings, if he had even the slightest inkling that he was being followed he'd bail._

 _They met up at an abandoned warehouse, Al had arrived first._

" _What's up?" Al asked, "I wasn't expecting to hear from you."_

 _Adam shrugged, "I know, I really didn't want to reach out, it's risky."_

" _I know that, yet here we are..." Al was well versed in undercover operations, "Clearly the risk is worth it if you're here, what's going on? Trust your gut, Adam." He hadn't told anyone that he was meeting up with Ruzek, in fact Adam had sent the an email to an account that only he and and Adam knew existed. It was only for emergencies, and his blood had run cold when he received the notification that he had an unread message._

 _Adam sighed, "I cant be sure, but I think she knows." She seemed jumpy around him, she had started excusing herself to take phone calls, she wasn't as forthcoming with information like she had previously been. It was a lot of little things that on their own didn't mean much but once he started to connect the dots, it left him feeling uneasy._

" _Okay." Al bobbed his head up and down, "How do you wanna play it? We can pull you..."_

" _No." Adam shook his head defiantly, "No. I'm close, too close to pull out now. I just need a little more time. If you wanted to put more eyes on me? Let's just say I'd be more than okay with that."_

" _Adam..." Al sighed, "Tell me why you think she knows?"_

" _Not sure." Adam told him, he kicked at the loose gravel beneath his feet, "She's just different. She is doing things she never did before, I dunno how to explain it, it's just different. I need you to be prepared. Something is off, man."_

 _Al made his mind up, "Forget it, You're done. I'm calling it." Olinsky didn't like what Adam was telling him, "I'll call Voight," He was already pulling his phone out._

" _No! No fucking way. Don't pull me out, not now. I can do this. I can bring these bastards down. I reached out because I wanted you to be aware of my concerns, I know you've already got eyes on me, I just think that maybe it's time to ramp that up a bit." Adam reiterated, "Let me do this."_

 _Al looked him in the eye, "Okay." He knew this was an improtant case and Adam had put in the time and effort and neither one wanted it to be for naught, "Alright. I'll talk to Voight we will make some changes on our end. You're on a short leash,kid. The first hint of trouble and it's done. We won't sit on our hands, we will take action. Keep focused, Adam. There's no room for error, you've got a beautiful family waiting for you to come home. They need you to come home."_

 _Adam nodded his head, "I'm coming home, as soon as I bring the bastards down." Adam replied, "How's Kim?"_

" _She's hanging in." Al had started having dinner with Kim and Sebastian on a weekly basis, "Sebastian has been keeping her busy."_

" _I miss them." His voice cracked a bit. The case was beginning to take its toll on him, "tell them I'll be home soon."_

 _Al grabbed him by the back of the neck, "Listen to me, Adam. We've got Kim and Sebastian under control, they're fine. Shit, they're great. You need to focus on the task at hand. Do your job, bring those sons of bitches down and come home."_

" _I will." Adam hugged him, "I'll be in touch."_

" _No. You won't." Al quickly corrected him, "I'll be in touch, I will come to you if need be. Stay focused Adam, be careful."_

"Kevin?" Adam's eyes had swelled making it difficult to see clearly, "Took you long enough..." he could hear Sage screaming in the distance, "got them?"

"We did." Kevin stepped aside when the paramedics arrived, "Don't worry about them though, they're not worth it."

Adam pushed the oxygen mask away, "Kim..."

"Adam, shut up man. You need the oxygen, we will get Kim once you're at the hospital." Kevin moved to replace the oxygen mask on his face, "I will go and get her myself."

His face was unbelievably swollen and covered in blood, his nose was obviously broken, "You need the oxygen, sir." The paramedic was growing impatient with him, "You need to stop talking, we need to get you loaded up in the ambo."

Olinsky appeared before them, "I'll ride with Adam, you go get Kim." He grabbed Adam's hand, "you did it, kid. You got the job done."

Kim had just started to dose off when her phone sprang to life instantly her heart was in her throat, she was careful to not wake Sebastian who was sleeping soundly beside her. She glanced over at the clock to see that it was nearly two in the morning.

She moved as quickly as her current state would allow, which wasn't fast at all. She accepted the call but didn't speak until she was in the hallway and had pulled the door closed, "Hello?"

Kevin exhaled, "Where are you?"

"At my sister's house." Kim told him, she began to pace the length of the hallway, "Is it over?" She had made Adam promise that someone would contact him as soon as the case was finished she preferred it to be Adam who called but knew that may not be possible.

They would do all they could to protect Adam's cover, it wasn't unheard of for an officer to end up in cuffs and tossed in the back of a squad car, just to keep his cover in place. Once in the clear he would need to be debriefed and all the red tape that entailed the end of a case.

Kim's question hung in the air for a bit, "Kevin?"

"Kim..." Kevin paused, "The operation is over, arrests have been made." He had already backed out of Kim and Adam's driveway and was headed to Nicole's house, "I'm thirty maybe forty minutes out..."

"What is going on? Tell me!" Kim shouted, "Is Adam okay?"

"He's been injured. He's stable, I told him I would pick you up and bring you to the hospital, can Sebastian stay with your sister?"

"Yes." Kim's hands began to tremble, "I need to wake her up. I can meet you at the hospital, you don't need to pick me up."

"The hell you will" Kevin scoffed, "I'm on my way Kim, I don't think it'll take as long, there's no traffic this time of night.."

"Please hurry."

Once Kevin arrived Kim had lost it a bit, the fact that Kevin was covered in Adam's blood didn't help, Kevin's constant reassurance that Adam was okay did nothing to calm her fears.

Kim was distraught.

As soon as they arrived at the hospital, she became a woman on a mission and that mission was getting to Adam's bedside. She had nearly run a few nurses over in her haste.

Kim threw open the door and was crushed to see Adam wasn't there, she charged back into the hallway, "Where's my husband.." her voice quivered a bit, "...the receptionist said he was here..." she glanced over her shoulder, "...in that room. In room 414. Where is he?"

Kevin placed his hand on the small of her back, "Kim, calm down. Give the nurse a chance to talk."

She cut her eyes at him, "I am calm, Kevin."

"Ok." Kevin backed off a bit, "I'm just worried about you, you're pregnant..."

"Let me check his chart." She read the doctor's notes, "The doctor ordered a CT scan. He should be back in his room in about twenty minutes or so." She came out from behind the desk, "you should sit down, when are you due?"

"A few weeks." Kim replied, "Why?"

"We need to make sure you're okay.."

Kim held her hands out, "I'm fine, see?" She was starting to become irate, "I don't know why any of this matters..." she was full of false bravado at the moment. She was barely holding it together.

Kevin wrapped his arm around her, "Kim, please come sit down."

"You can wait in your husband's room, I can get you something to drink..."

"I don't want a drink! I don't want to sit down!" She roared, "I want to see my husband! I need to see him, I need him..." she lost it, thankfully Kevin still had ahold of her, she turned in his arms and sobbed.

Kevin held her as tightly as her pregnant state would allow, he knew nothing he said would bring her comfort so he held her.

Sebastian rubbed his eyes as he sat up in bed, "Mommy?" He was soaked, tears filled his eyes and his lip quivered, a feeling of embarrassment washed over him.

He had done it again.

He had an accident.

"Mommy?" He called out, he could see the lights on downstairs and headed that way.

Nicole held her phone tightly in her right hand and the television remote in the other. She had yet to hear from Kim and with each passing hour she felt the mountain of fear in her gut grow larger. She had tried to distract herself by watching television but it wasn't helping. It was ridiculously late, and informercials seemed to be on every station.

She was surprised to hear the sound of footfalls on the stairs, she glanced over her shoulder and saw Sebastian standing on the landing, his arm wrapped around the railing, "Sebastian baby come here..."

He shook his head, his cheeks a crimson red. "Mommy isn't in bed."

"I know." She patted the couch beside her, "Come sit and snuggle with Aunt Coley." She had been over the moon the first time he had referred to her as 'Coley', he had first said when he was about two years old and it had stuck; she hoped he'd always use that name for her.

"No." Sebastian pulled his bottom lip between his teeth.

"Baby.." Nicole went to him, he quickly covered his wet pajamas with his hands, "Oh honey..did you have an accident?"

"I want mommy." He told her, "Where is she?"

"She had to go out." She had promised Kim she wouldn't tell Sebastian that she had gone to the hospital. "We need to get you cleaned up, how about a nice warm bath?"

"Okay." He took her offered hand and allowed her to lead him back upstairs, "I'm sorry I peed in the bed. I didn't know I needed to potty."

"You don't have to say sorry sweetheart, it was an accident."

"Did mommy have to go to work? Are there bad guys?" He was accustomed to his parents having to go to work at strange times, it was often Adam but it wasn't unheard of that it was Kim who'd have to leave.

"She did." Nicole replied, "It wasn't a bad guy though, she just needed to check in on someone." It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't exactly the truth either.

Kim was focusing on what she knew, Adam was stable and had been aware of what had happened as was able to answer the doctor's question. She would feel a thousand times better when she could lay her eyes on him. The fact that she hadn't seem him in two months didn't help matters, she needed to her his voice. She needed to hold his hand in her's and she was desperate to feel his arms around her.

Kevin had been in and out of the room, he had run point between the waiting room and Adam's room, the unit had taken over the waiting room and Kevin was doing his best to keep them all in the loop.

"Look who I found." Kevin teased as he opened the door.

Kim jumped up as Adam was brought in the room, she gasped "Adam..baby..."

Adam was in significant pain, "Darlin' you're a sight for sore eyes." He mumbled, "Don't cry..." he reached up to touch her face as she took hold of his hand, "I'm fine..just a little banged up."

She placed a light kiss on his lips, "Just a little, huh?" She smoothed his hair, "Your face looks awful."

"Ouch.." Adam smirked, even a movement as slight as a smirk hurt like hell.

"What are we dealing with?" Kim looked to the doctor.

"Adam suffered a broken nose, fractured orbital bone and severe bruising to his chest. We are going to admit him for the night...well, what's left of it." He explained, "It's purely precautionary at this point, he took a pretty serious beating..."

"I got the job done though.." Adam pointed out.

"I don't give a shit, Adam." Kim scolded him, "I can't even think about that right now." She felt the knot of anxiety in her chest begin to unravel a bit and she could finally breathe again.

"Ah, I feel like this is my cue to leave..." the doctor teased, "Adam, try and sleep. I've prescribed some IV pain meds. The nurse should be in soon to get that started, I will check on you in a few hours, if all looks good we will discharge in the next day or two."

"I'm good doc.." Adam tried to plead his case, only to wince in pain.

"Yeah, you're so good. Adam, you're hurting. You need to be here." Kim gingerly kissed his forehead, "I want you at home as well, but not until you're ready."

Adam grabbed her hand, "I wanna see our boy."

"You will. Nicole will bring him up in the morning." Kim grabbed her purse, "I need to call and let her know what's going on." She turned to Kevin, "Will you let everyone in the waiting room know what's going on?"

"Of course." Kevin hugged her before turning to Adam, "I'm glad you're okay, Adam."

"Thanks, man. I owe you. I owe all of you." He struggled to reposition himself, "you could've shown up twenty minutes earlier but hey..at least you showed up, right?"

Kevin laughed, "Better late than never, I'll check on you both in a few hours."

"Kim, it's late.." Adam hated that she had moved to the other side of the room to call her sister. He needed her close to him, close enough to touch, "call her later."

"You know what she's like, Adam." Kim scoffed, "I'm sure she's worried. I also need to check on Sebastian. It'll take two minutes."

"Well, can you at least sit down over here. With me." He didn't care that it came out as a whine, he was whining. He'd been away from her for months, he was in pain, he needed her at his side.

Nicole was dead tired, Sebastian hadn't gone back to sleep choosing instead to watch cartoons Netflix, she had managed to doze for a little bit but it wasn't nearly enough. Mikey was an early riser and he had taken up residence next to Sebastian on the couch, the pair totally engrossed in the television.

Neither boy batted an eye when the phone rang.

She was relieved to hear that Adam was going to be okay, despite having to spend a few days in the hospital.

"Sebastian, baby." Nicole held the phone up, "The phone is for you."

Sebastian climbed over his cousin, "Hello?"

"Man..."

Sebastian squealed, "Daddy!"

Adam did his best to blink away the tears in his eyes, the sound of his son's voice was music to his ears, "I love you pal."

"Where are you?"

"The hospital. I'm okay though, just banged up a little bit. Mommy is going to have Aunt Coley bring you up to see me in a little bit."

"Bad guys hurt you?"

"Just a little bit. The good guys won. Kevin and Jay arrested them." Adam explained, "I can't wait to see you pal..."

His words had fallen on deaf ears, "Sorry Adam, he shoved the phone at me and took off running." Nicole laughed, "I'm glad you're okay."

"Yeah, me too. Thanks for being there for Kim." Adam appreciated how everyone circled the wagons around Kim and Sebastian. "here's Kim."

Kim kissed his cheek, "Go to sleep."

Nicole had moved out of ear shot of the boys, "Okay, tell me how _you're_ doing?" She knew how stressed Kim was becoming as she inched closer to her due date and Adam still wasn't home.

"In a word? Relieved." Kim laughed, "Adam is okay, he did his job they've made several arrests. I'm ready to put it behind us."

"I bet."

Kim glanced over at Adam, the swelling and bruising on his face seemed to get worse by the minute, his right eye was swollen shut. "How is Sebastian?"

Nicole looked in on them, "He's good. He's pretty excited." She moved into the kitchen, "He had another accident."

"Shit.." Kim sighed, "How was he?"

"A bit embarrassed but I assured him it was okay, he woke up and couldn't find you. He was really teary eyed."

Kim caught movement out of the corner of her eye, it was Adam holding his hands up a clear sign he wanted to know what she was talking about, "I need to go, kiss my baby and yours for me and we will see you in a few hours."

Adam adjusted the back of the bed, bringing himself to a more upright position, "What's going on? Is Sebastian okay?"

Kim grabbed his hands, "He is. Just a few weeks ago he started having accidents in the night. He is embarrassed by them."

"He shouldn't be. It's an accident."

"I know that. You know that. He thinks it makes him a baby." Kim had taken him to to doctor when it started happening, Adam had been gone for six weeks at that point and it was happening almost nightly.

The doctor examined him and did a full blood work up and everything came back clear. She then proceeded to ask Kim if there had been any major changes in Sebastian's life, Kim explained that Adam had been working a case.

Kim left the appointment with some suggestions on how to help get a handle on the accidents, and feeling a bit down. The doctor was positive that Adam's absence was the antecedent for Sebastian's bedwetting, it broke her heart. Sebastian was struggling with Adam being gone, and it sucked.

He would occasionally tell her that he missed Adam or that he wanted him but it was always an of the cuff remark and then he'd be on his way. Kim didn't make a big deal out of it, she'd usually reply with an ' _I know_ ' and be done with it. She never gave it a second thought and now she was feeling sick to her stomach.

Adam noticed the worry in her eyes, "Talk to me..."

Kim interrupted him "You need to sleep."

"I do and I will, but I need you to talk to me." Adam was exhausted but he wasn't going to let this go, "Kim, come on.."

She grabbed a tissue and dabbed at her eyes, "Sebastian is fine, the bed wetting wasn't anything physical.." she paused she knew what she was about to say was going to upset him, "the doctor said it was more a of an emotional issue."

"Cause I was gone. Right?" He sucked his teeth, "I'm sorry. I didn't think it would drag on for as long as it did. I was busting my ass to get home to you both."

"You did. You're home." Kim carefully kissed him on the mouth, "I could've gone without the hospital visit..but you're home and I'm over the moon about it." She turned her head upon hearing a knock on the door.

"Hi.." the nurse smiled at them both, "I'm here to grab your vitals and get your IV pain meds flowing."

"Nice.." Adam grinned, "the good stuff I hope."

She laughed, "It's the good stuff, it'll have you asleep in minutes."

"Good." Kim replied, "He needs it."

Kim watched intently as the nurse tended to Adam, and smiled politely at her as she left.

"Sit." Adam ordered, "let me see that belly..."

Kim snickered a bit as his speech started to slur and his eyelids were growing heavy, she grabbed his hand and placed on her belly, "Little one has missed the sound of your voice.." Kim stroked his hand, "Go to sleep Adam, don't try and fight it."

He attempted to mutter something but his tongue felt thick and the words seemed to be just out of reach, it was a garbled mess but Kim smiled.

"I love you too. I'm not leaving. I promise." Kim brought his hand to her lips and kissed, "Sleep tight my love."

Mikey was not pleased.

He made sure everyone knew it, he kicked and screamed with all his might as Nicole peeled him off and handed him over to her sister in law, "Nic..go, he will be fine." Heather tried to wrangle the wrangle the screaming toddler, "I promise."

Nicole felt awful, "Call me if he doesn't calm down, and I will come back. I just need to get Sebastian to the hospital. I need to hug my sister."

"I will. I promise." Heather rubbed Mikey's back, "Tell Kim I said hi and that I'm glad Adam is going to be okay."

For the first time in weeks Kim slept soundly, in spite of the uncomfortable recliner. With the help of a nurse she had maneuvered it as close to Adam's bed as she could get and slept with Adam's hand held atop her belly.

Thankfully Adam was still out cold, the swelling in his face seemed to have leveled off but the bruising had really started to show. It was horrific to see the damage that had been inflicted upon him.

She had made it clear to everyone that she didn't want to know any details of what had happened to him, her focus was on Adam and his health.

The rest could wait.

She had already exchanged a few texts with Nicole and while she was anxious to see Sebastian, she was worried about how he'd react to seeing Adam. The bruising was intense, it fanned out across his face and coupled with the swelling it left him almost unrecognizable. She asked Nicole to prepare Sebastian for Adam's condition, the last thing Sebastian or Adam needed was for Sebastian to be leery of him.

Kim kept herself busy as Adam slept, she had reached out to her circle of PPD moms throughout the time Adam was undercover, and it had been a tremendous help. She knew they understood her fears in a way that only those who faced the same demons could understand.

She had sent a group text to let them know she'd be 'off the grid' for a bit, explaining that Adam's case was over and that he had been injured in the process. She also answered a ton of emails and rearranged meetings and found coverage for events that couldn't be cancelled or rescheduled.

"Darlin'..." It was barely audible but it was a glorious sound.

"I'm here, babe." She set her phone on the table, "how're you feeling?" The nurse had been pleased with his vitals when she had checked in on him earlier.

"Okay.." it was a lie and they both knew it, "Come here..."

Kim complied with his request.

Adam pushed himself up as best he could and grabbed ahold of her with both hands and kissed her, he poured every ounce of strength he had into the kiss ignoring the pain he felt as he did so.

Kim had a death grip on the back of his neck, "I've missed you so much.." she muttered as she rested her forehead against his, "I love you."

"I love you too." He tucked her hand behind her ear, "I'm sorry I've been gone for so long. I never thought it would stretch in like this."

"It's over now, that's all that matters." Kim told him, "Nicole should be here soon with Sebastian, they just had to drop Mikey off with her sister in law."

"How are you feeling?" Adam ran his hand over her belly, "Is little one growing as it should?"

"Yes. Everything is as it should be." Truer words had never been spoken.

"Can we go now?" Sebastian asked as he bounced from foot to foot in the lobby of the hospital, "Aunt Coley?"

"Just a second buddy." She was calling her sister in law to check on Mikey, "I just want to make sure that Mikey has calmed down. He was really upset he couldn't come with us."

"Okay." He sighed, "I just want my daddy." He scurried over to the small section of toys in the corner of what appeared to be the waiting room, "I can play."

Nicole kept her eyes on him the entire time, he had stated that he was going to play but he sat solemnly on the couch and half heartedly flipped through a picture book. She was relieved when her sister in law picked up, the conversation was short and sweet. Nicole could hear Mikey's giggles in the background.

"Alright big boy, lets go see your daddy." Nicole offered her hand to him.

He slipped his hand in hers and looked up at her, "Is Mikey ok?"

"He is. He was playing with his other cousins, he was laughing and having fun." Nicole explained. "Remember your dad looks pretty banged up but he's okay. The doctors said he is going to be good as new in a few weeks."

"I remember." Sebastian smiled, "I'm still a little bit scared. I don't like it when he gets bad owies, I don't like it when bad guys hurt him. It's not nice." He didn't know a lot of things but he knew that was wrong, it wasn't kind or nice to hurt people. He had once hit another boy when he was at park with his mommy and she wasn't happy with him at all, he had gotten in a lot of trouble that day. He didn't like how sad it made his mom, she was so upset with him. He really didn't like that, he never wanted his mommy to be upset with him again. "Don't the bad guys know that it's not nice to hurt people?" He asked her as they waited for the elevator.

Nicole shrugged, "They do know. They just don't care. That's what makes them bad guys. Sebastian." She explained, "Thankfully the world has far more good guys than it does bad guys."

"Daddy's a good guy, Uncle Michael is a good guy too?" He looked up at her, he was almost an exact replica of Adam, but in that moment he reminded her so much of Kim when she was a little girl.

"Yes, Bud. Your daddy and Uncle Michael are good guys, some of the best guys."

Sebastian beamed, "I know lots of good guys, Aunt Coley. My Grandpa Bob, Al, Kevin, Jay..." he counted them off on his fingers, "So many good guys."

"Adam..." Kim groaned, "You need to eat." Her patience was running thin, he wasn't the easiest patient and he made it clear he wanted to go home and when he was told he needed to stay another night he started to sulk.

He poked at the plate of food in front of him, "It's nasty. The eggs are rubbery and it's fucking turkey bacon, who the hell eats that shit?"

"People who want to be discharged from the hospital." She did little to hide her annoyance with him, "I want you to come home Adam..."

"I sense a but coming.." Adam chirped as he pushed the tray aside.

"I want to make sure it's safe for you to come home" she told him, "the doctors want to play it safe and I don't think that's such a terrible idea. You've got a broken face, Adam."

"No shit, Kim." Adam was painfully aware of his injuries, "but there is nothing for them to do, they've reset my nose and everything else will heal on it's own, what's another night here going to do?"

"Peace of mind. It will give me peace of mind." Kim told him, "Isn't that enough?"

Adam grabbed her hand, "Okay. I'll stop bitching about it." He pulled her in for a kiss, "I'm still not eating that shit..."

"Daddy!" The door flew open and Sebastian was suddenly at his bedside.

"Sorry!" Nicole apologized, "I tried slowing him down but he wasn't having it." She hugged Kim, "How are you?"

Kim had tears in her eyes, "I'm okay..." she was watching Sebastian as he interacted with Adam, "It's all still a bit of a blur.." she wiped her eyes, "Thanks for bringing him up here, I'm not sure who needed this visit more, Adam or Sebastian..." She paused, "...or myself."

"Probably all of you. It's been a rough couple of months for everyone, but that's all over now. Nothing but good things coming your way, including my newest niece or nephew who could show up at anytime now, huh?"

Kim laughed, "Yes, I'd like that as well. Especially now that Adam is home." She hadn't wanted to allow herself to even think about labor until Adam was home and it was beginning to get too close for comfort, her delivery date was just over a week away. She knew full well though that she could've gone into labor at any point over the last two weeks or so.

"They hurt you." Sebastian lightly touched the bruising on Adam's chest, "that wasn't nice. I don't like that part but I like that you are done working. It was too long daddy."

"Ah, I know man. Daddy didn't like it either. I really wanted to come home to you and mommy." Adam explained, "I had to stay though, I needed to catch the bad guys."

"Did you?"

"Yep! I got them all. They're in jail."

"Cause they hurt you?" Sebastian asked him.

"Partly. They're bad people buddy and they needed to go to jail. They'll be there for a long time. We don't need to worry about them. Al and Hank made sure of it."

"They helped you?"

"They did. Kevin was the first to help me."

Sebastian's smile grew, "Did Kevin beat them up?"

"He did." Adam smiled, he grabbed Sebastian by the back of the neck, "I love you Son. I've missed you something awful, once I'm all healed up we've got so many adventures to go on."

Sebastian chewed on his bottom lip a bit, "Daddy I don't want you to pretend to be a bad guy anymore that's too scary. I like it when you're a regular cop. Not one that plays pretend."

It was a kick to the nuts, "Bud, I'm so sorry. I hate that you were scared for me. I can't promise I won't ever have to go undercover again but I can promise it won't happen anytime soon okay? I don't want you to worry about that."

"Okay daddy. I love you." He wrapped his arms around Adam's neck and held on for dear life.

It hurt like hell to have Sebastian hugging him so tightly but Adam welcomed it, he felt Kim slip her arms around them both.

It was in that moment that he lost it, he was a blubbering mess.

It was hours later when Al and Hank showed up, "Kim, can you and Sebastian go grab some dinner. Real food not the shit the hospital tries to pass off as food." Adam knew he had a lot to discuss with them and Kim didn't need to hear it.

Kim wasn't stupid she knew he wanted to discuss the case and he didn't want her around when they did, "Sure. How do burgers sound?"

"Perfect." He was no longer on an IV he had progressed to oral pain pills and was feeling more alert. He still hurt like hell but he was no longer in a pain medication induced fog.

"I'll stay." Sebastian declared he had already attached himself to Al's side, "I wanna stay with you daddy and Al and Hank."

"Honey, you need to come with me. You know I need help carrying the food." She told him, "I'm sure Al and Hank won't leave before we come back."

"Nope." Al tousled his hair, "A chocolate shake would be nice, do you think you could get me one?" He adored this kid, he was as close to a grandchild as he'd ever get and while Lexi was irreplaceable and he'd never get over losing her, Sebastian brought him so much joy and he gave him a reason to smile again.

"Me too!" Hank chimed in, "Those are damn good shakes."

"Got it! Two chocolate shakes Mommy." Sebastian had detached himself from Al's side and was more than happy to go with his mother.

Kim gave Adam a quick kiss before heading out.

Both Hank and Al watched as Kim and Sebastian left waiting until they stepped into the elevator before they spoke.

Adam knew what was coming, "Let me have it."

"You were sloppy." Hank admonished him, "I'd like to kick your ass but those bastards beat me to it. What the fuck happened?"

Adam ran his hands wearily through his hair, "I dunno. I fucked up. I was missing Kim. Her due date was inching closer and closer and I was getting antsy. I knew I needed to wrap it up but it wasn't coming together as quickly as I hoped. Then Sage..she started acting weird..."

"You reached out to Al?"

"Yeah..." Adam nodded his head.

"That's when I fucked up, Adam. I should've pulled you on the spot. I knew your head wasn't where it needed to be, I could see it in your eyes. I never should've let you leave that day." Al spoke up, he'd been second guessing himself ever since they rushed Adam to the hospital.

Hank waved his hands around, "You both fucked up no doubt but ultimately the buck stops with me and I let you stay put. I wanted you to see it through to the end, and that was a mistake and it's on me." He folded his arms across his chest, "lucky for us it worked out, we made the arrests, and you're okay. We can't dwell on the mistakes we made but I can promise you this, they won't be repeated. Right now your job is to recover from your injuries, spend some time with your family and prepare for the new baby. We will discuss everything in a few weeks, right now focus on your family."

"Thanks." Adam shook his offered hand, when he thought Voight was about to leave he was quick to remind him to stay, "Boss, Sebastian is bringing you back a shake, he'll be pissed if you leave."

"I'm not leaving Adam. Just getting comfy." He offered half a smile when he dropped into the recliner and kicked his feet up, "Those shakes are worth hanging out with your dumbass for a little bit."

True to their words Al and Hank both waited until Kim and Sebastian returned before leaving, they stayed for about an hour or so and Sebastian had kept them all entertained with his crazy antics and poorly told jokes.

Sebastian had fallen asleep just an hour or so later, and Adam could see that Kim wasn't far behind.

"Go home." Adam poked her arm, "You're exhausted, I know you didn't sleep much last night and I don't want you to leave but I know you need to go. You need to sleep in our bed, Sebastian needs to sleep in his own bed. You need to get here first thing in the morning though. I'm leaving as soon as the sun comes up and no one will stop me."

Kim knew he was right but she hated the thought of leaving him, "I know I do...I just don't wanna leave you." She kissed him, "Ugh...Alright, I will go home." She thumbed over her shoulder, "He will not be happy."

Adam laughed, "He's gonna be pissed but he will get over it."

"Promise me you will call if you need anything." Kim begged him, "I will come back up."

"Like hell you will." Adam shook his head, "I'll call a nurse if I need something. I will call you later though, you should leave your cellphone and then FaceTime me from Sebastian's iPad."

"I will."

"Maybe you can wait until he's in bed and maybe we can get a little saucy..."

"You're an idiot." Kim kissed him once more, "Such an idiot."

Adam watched as she roused Sebastian from sleep, and just as expected he wasn't happy but he was appeased by the promise of returning to the hospital first thing in the morning.

Kim couldn't keep the tears at bay when she hugged Adam one last time before leaving, it sucked leaving him but she took solace in the fact that she would be picking him up in the morning.

 _ **Thanks for the sweet reviews, I had gone back and forth on wether I should go ahead work this story after losing interest in the show. I've stopped watching the show, I no longer enjoy it and it's more than just the Upzek pairing, though that has played a huge part in it. Only two chapters remain and then I'm done with writing, I don't foresee that changing anytime soon.**_

 _ **Thanks for giving my stories a shot and all the kind words! They're much appreciated.**_


	4. Did We Just Name Our Kid

Things were finally returning to normal, or as close to normal as their lives could ever be. Adam had been home for a few weeks now but had not yet returned to work. His recovery was going well, but it would take six to eight weeks for the fractures to heal and only then would he be able to return work.

Sebastian and Kim both loved having Adam home, though Adam wasn't as excited. He didn't do ' _resting_ ' well, and Kim had scolded him more than a few times for doing too much. They had to find a happy medium, and once they did it was smooth sailing.

Sebastian wasn't taking to kindergarten as they had hoped and would try anything to stay home from school. It wasn't unexpected after everything that had gone down the last few months, they told Sebastian's teacher about it and she was quick to assure them that Sebastian would adjust and promised to help him along the but it wouldn't be long before he was enjoying school.

Both Kim and Adam loved , she's been teaching for nearly twenty years and reminded Adam of Geraldine.

As if Sebastian's issues with school weren't enough, Kim was officially 'overdue' and that added a bit more to their already overflowing plate.

The doctor had decided it was time to get the ball rolling, and Kim was headed to the hospital in the morning to be induced.

.

Adam had already dropped Sebastian off at his father's house to spend the night, he returned with a carton of ice cream and a brand new baby naming book.

He wasn't surprised to find Kim napping on the couch, he set her bowl of ice cream on the coffee table and sat down beside her, pulling her feet into his lap, "I'm home."

Kim muttered in her sleep, "I know..l heard you. You're not quiet." She didn't bother to open her eyes, "keep doing that..it feels good." He was rubbing her painfully swollen ankles and feet.

"I brought ice cream." Adam told her.

Her eyes flew open and she was suddenly wide awake, "What kind?"

Adam laughed, "Now you're awake. Cherry Garcia. Your favorite."

Kim grabbed him and kissed him hard and fast, "I knew I loved you for a reason." She practically climbed over him to get the bowl off the table, "mmmm, thank you for this. It's so good."

"I'll never know. You don't share." Adam pretended to be annoyed, "I also bought this.." he held the book up, "We need to agree on a name for this baby, it'll be here sometime tomorrow and we've got nothing.."

Kim shrugged, "Once it's born it'll be easier, we don't even know it's gender." She was enjoying the ice cream immensely, she held the spoon out to him, "would you like a taste?"

"Seriously?" Adam was blown away.

"Yes or no?" She retorted, "Don't be a jerk.." she huffed, "you're not that funny you know."

"Yes!, I'll have some" Adam laughed, she slipped the spoon in his mouth, "...wow..you weren't lying that's good shit, and just so you know people think I'm funny."

"Yeah okay...Sebastian doesn't count, he thinks everything is funny..." she rolled her eyes at him, "it's delicious..Isn't it? Now you know why I don't share." Kim wiped a smidge of it off his lips, "it's too good to share with anyone..including you." She finished it in record time, "You know tonight is the last night we can have sex..." she ran her hand along his inner thigh, "..for like six weeks.."

"Darlin' don't tease me..." Adam inhaled sharply as her hand inched higher up his thigh, "you're playing with fire right now..I thought you were tired.." his eyes fluttered closed as she kissed his neck.

"I was, and now I'm not..." She carefully straddled his lap, her very pregnant belly made it a bit difficult but she managed, "I want you so bad right now..."

Adam laughed at her choice of her words, "Do you now?" He remembered a time early in their relationship before anyone knew they were together, when he had uttered those same words. They had their first hiccup earlier that day, once their case had been solved Adam had found her in the records room and had made his intentions known.

That night had been amazing, and Adam hoped tonight would be just as amazing.

"I do." Kim purred.

Hours later they lay in bed the baby name book lying between them, "Seth?" Adam suggested, "I mean I don't love it by any means but I don't hate it either.."

"Well, I hate it." Kim actually shivered a bit at the thought of naming her child Seth, "What about Robert, after your dad?"

"Hell no." Adam shot it down immediately, "Robert Ruzek? No thanks, I don't know what my grandparents were thinking when they named my pops, that's a horrible name." They'd gone through dozens of boys names and still hadn't found one they liked, "How about we look at girls names."

Kim turned the page in the notebook and wrote _Girls_ at the top of the page, "Emily?"

Adam shrugged, "Its okay, it's popular. It works with Ruzek." He told her, "I could see naming our kid Emily."

"You're settling, I can tell. You don't love it and to be honest I don't either." She told him. "Your turn."

Adam moved to kiss her bare belly, "Willa?"

"That's a no from me, way too trendy." She flipped through the pages and landed on the 'D' names, "Destiny?"

Adam laughed, "Destiny Ruzek, that's awful. She'd already have her stripper name. No thank you." It was his turn to shiver at the suggestion.

"Daniela? Daisy? Daphne? Dahlia? Delilah? Dakota?" She rattled a bunch off at him.

"Delilah." Adam repeated, "I like that."

Kim tapped the pen against the book, "Delilah. I like it as well, actually I love it. It's pretty and unique."

"Delilah Ruzek. Sebastian and Delilah." Adam smiled, "Did we just name our kid?"

"We did if our kid is a girl..we've got to come up with a boys name."

Adam grabbed the book from her and set it on the nightstand, "I think we should celebrate coming up with a girls name." He kissed her neck, "We need to make good use of this time babe, let me love you..."

He made good on his offer, he had loved every inch of her, he made sure she knew exactly how he felt about her, it wasn't long before they both drifted off to sleep.

Kim woke with a start, it took her a few minutes to realize what was happening, "Adam...wake up.." she frantically shoved him in the back, "Adam! Wake up!"

She turned the light on, "Adam! Adam!"

"What the hell is wrong with you? I'm fucking exhausted..." he grumbled burying his face in a pillow, a tired Adam made for a very grumpy Adam.

"Well, my fucking water broke..I'm sure your dick finding its way inside my vagina at every opportunity tonight had a hand in that..." she went about pulling the covers off him, "get up and get dressed. We need to go."

Adam grabbed a clean pair of boxers and pulled them on, "Are you mad at me?" He found his hastily discarded jeans got dressed, "It kind of feels like you are and I'm not sure why. You practically jumped me..multiple times." He continued to talk even as Kim went into the bathroom and proceeded to take a shower, "In just a few hours the doctors were going to induce you, just think of it as a head start on things. If you ask me I did you a favor..." he called out to her.

"A favor? Shit, you're full of yourself aren't you?" Kim was out of the shower in almost record time, she wrapped a robe tightly around her body and dried off before getting dressed.

Adam grabbed her wrist as she attempted to leave their bedroom, "You're mad? You're seriously mad at me?"

"No." Kim looked at him, tears in her eyes, "I'm scared." Her lip quivered ever so slightly and it was like a dagger to Adam's heart.

"Baby." Adam pulled her into his arms, "I'm here for you, I'm here every step of the way, you're going to do great."

"Sebastian's birth was so hard, Adam. It was awful, his poor little face was bruised . It was a disaster, I don't want that to happen again." She explained, "Everything went wrong last time, what if it this delivery is the same?" She was spinning out, "What if this was a mistake and I lose everything..."

Adam was stunned by her admission, she pulled away from him and tried to leave the room, he grabbed her hips "Stop. I need you to stop. I want you to listen closely to me..." he waited until she turned around and looked him in the eyes, "You are the strongest person I know, you've faced demons that no one should ever encounter, you fought your way out of the darkness. Then you fought for this family, you fought for us." He kissed her softly on the lips, "You can do this, I know it. It may not go smoothly, and that scares me but no matter what happens we will do it together."

Kim caressed his cheek, "I don't want to let you down,.."

"You won't let me down.." Adam's eyes filled with tears, "You won't fight alone this time. I'm here with you."

Adam kept his hand on Kim's knee as he drove, he was battling his own fears and the last thing he wanted was for Kim to see how scared he was. They rode in silence for most of the way, it felt a bit like the calm before the storm.

Once Kim was settled in her room and the obgyn had examined her, Adam stepped outside to call their families and update them on where things stood.

Kim had done a 180 in regards to her wishes for this delivery in comparison to her wishes for Sebastian's birth, she had learned so much since then. She no longer desired to do an all natural birth, she was okay with having an epidural. She wanted to breast feed but knew it may not be their best option, she knew that she had no control over much of what was about to happen, the only thing she could control was how she reacted to the situation.

While Adam was outside Kim found herself thinking about Cheryl and how much she missed her, Cheryl died before Kim and Adam reconciled. Kim was glad that Cheryl had known Sebastian, not that Sebastian remembered her but it was important to Kim. She wished this new baby would've had the chance to know her, Cheryl had died years ago but bringing a new life into the world had Kim missing her more than she had in a long time.

"Hey.." Adam noticed her tear stained cheeks, "You were crying?"

Kim nodded her head, "I miss Cheryl."

"Ah..babe.." Adam sighed, "I know you do, she'd be so proud of you. You know that right?"

"I do." She grabbed his hand, "I wish you had the chance to know her, she was awesome."

"So I've heard." Adam thought for a moment, "If this baby is a girl do you want to name her Cheryl?"

"No." Kim replied, "Cheryl would hate that, but I love you for suggesting it. I've fallen in love with the name Delilah. If this baby is a girl, that's her name."

"She'd hate it?"

"Yes, she would. She didn't like to be the center of attention, she was so humble Adam. She preferred to stay in the shadows, and let her work speak for itself. I think as long as our children know about Cheryl and what she did for me and hundreds of other women that's how we will honor her."

Adam wiped the tears from beneath her eyes, "That's what we will do, baby. Our kids will know how important Cheryl was to you, and how she helped to bring you back to us."

They both managed to get some sleep, they knew they were in for a long day. Kim woke before Adam had, she had managed to FaceTime Sebastian without waking Adam up and then the doctor had preformed an exam while Adam slept.

Kim had been blown away to hear how much progress she had made and that the doctor expected her to deliver within the next few hours.

Adam had been just as surprised when he woke up and Kim filled him in.

They never had a chance to recover from their surprise as it was just an hour later that their child came into the world.

Their baby was clearly in a hurry to meet them.


	5. Night and Day

Night and Day.

It was almost as if that simple phrase had been written with her in mind. It perfectly described her experiences with child birth.

Sebastian's delivery was long and exhausting, it was draining both physically and mentally and nothing had gone according to plan.

Her more recent delivery had been a walk in the park compared to Sebastian's.

It was night and day.

In the weeks that followed the trend continued, they had prepared themselves for the worst but thankfully it was unnecessary.

Things had gone as close to perfection as life could get.

They had their little lady and she was beautiful, she was a petite little thing with a headful of dark silky hair and beautiful brown eyes, a perfect mix of Burgess and Ruzek genes. Her fingers were long and slender and Kim would never grow tired of having those perfect fingers curled around her's.

As smitten as she was with her daughter, it didn't come close to the level of smitten-ness that was Adam.

They were in trouble.

Delilah Cheryl Ruzek was already a Daddy's girl, at just four months old she had Adam wrapped around her little finger. Her face lit up at the sound of his voice, she loved to sleep on his chest, she just loved to be in his presence.

Sebastian was briefly disappointed when he learned he had a baby sister, Kim's eyes still teared up when she thought back on Sebastian meeting Delilah for the first time.

" _Hey mommy." Sebastian went to the side of the bed, "Where's the baby?" He shoved a small bouquet of flowers in her hands, "GG said we should buy flowers for you...here."_

 _Kim brought them to her nose, "They're beautiful and smell so good. Thank you baby." She smiled at Géraldine over Sebastian's head, she pulled him in for a hug, "Daddy went to get the baby. Can you go to the sink and wash your hands, do a really good job okay? Make lots of soapy suds, you need to wash all the germs away."_

 _Geraldine led him to the sink and helped him. "So..." she glanced back at Kim, "What do we have a boy or a girl?"_

" _You'll find out soon enough, once Bob gets here and Adam is back." Kim beckoned Sebastian back over, "Come give me another hug, I've missed my big boy so much. You were a good boy, yes?"_

" _I was, right GG?"_

" _You know it. He even at his broccoli last night. That earned him an ice cream sundae." She adored spending time with Sebastian._

" _It was really good, mom. GG let me squirt the whipped cream right into my mouth, that was so much fun."_

 _Adam had just rounded the corner when he ran into his father, "Pops!" Adam beamed, "Hey..."_

 _Bob grinned, "Hey, Son." He quickly hugged Adam before turning his attention to the sleeping baby in the bassinet, "is this my grandbaby?"_

" _Nah, I just figured I'd wheel some random kid around."_

" _Ever the smart ass." Bob chuckled, "You know what I meant, so..." he ran his finger down the baby's cheek, "boy or girl...the kid is gorgeous."_

" _You'll find out soon enough, Kim's room is just a few doors away."_

" _Then we played video games, but not GG she doesn't like them, she was knitting instead. That's boring though. I didn't want to help, that was okay though wasn't GG?" Sebastian was curled into Kim's side._

" _That's right, sweetie. Knitting is kind of boring but I enjoy it."_

" _That's cause you're old. Old people like boring things."_

" _Sebastian James!" Kim felt a blush creep across her cheeks, "That's not nice to say. I'm sorry, he's just like Adam, he doesn't have a filter."_

" _Kim, honey he's not saying anything I didn't already know" she chuckled. "I am old."_

" _Daddy!" Sebastian jumped off the bed as soon as the door opened, completely ignoring the baby and his grandfather._

" _Hey, Man." Adam caught Sebastian as he lunged at him, "I missed you bud, you ready to meet your baby?"_

" _Yeah."_

" _Go climb up on Mommy's bed, just be gentle." Adam carefully lifted his daughter from her bassinet, kissing her forehead as he did so._

 _Kim helped Sebastian, she positioned his arms, "Sebastian meet your baby..." she paused as Adam placed the baby in Sebastian arms. She was throughly enjoying the pained look on Geraldine's face._

" _Kim...this isn't funny." Geraldine whined._

" _Yes it is." Adam laughed._

" _Sister." Kim finally announced._

" _Yay!" Geraldine squealed, a squeal of pure unadulterated joy. She had happy tears pouring from her eyes, "I am so excited, what's her name?"_

" _A girl?" Sebastian frowned, "I wanted a brother."_

" _Funny you should say that.." Adam grabbed a small bag from the table, "your sister was a little worried you'd be disappointed, she wanted to get you a little something..."_

" _Daddy, that's silly babies can't talk. She didn't say that..." Sebastian wasn't buying it._

" _So you don't want what's in here?" Adam held it up, "I'm sure I can return it."_

" _No! I want it daddy." Sebastian was quick to respond._

" _Here you go." Adam handed it to him._

 _Kim lifted the baby from Sebastian's lap so he could open his gift._

 _Sebastian had been on a serious dinosaur kick as of late, he was infatuated with them. They were all he talked about and he could go for hours. He could spend an entire morning playing with his dinosaurs, he was bordering on obsessed._

 _As he pulled the tissue paper out of the bag a massive grin filled his face, "It's a diplodocus, thanks baby!" He hugged the plastic dinosaur to his chest, "I love it!" He held the toy for the baby to see, "He eats leaves off really tall trees, that's why his neck is so long." He explained to his sister, "I'm glad you buyed this for me." He placed a kiss on her cheek, "I guess it's okay that you're not a brother."_

" _How nice of you Sebastian." Bob laughed, "Does this beautiful baby have a name?"_

" _She does." Kim scooted over in the bed so Sebastian could squeeze in beside her, Adam having handed the baby to Geraldine, "Meet Delilah."_

" _I love it, it's such a pretty name" Geraldine kissed her granddaughter, "Hello sweet Delilah, I'm your GG and I can't wait to spoil you."_

" _Delilah Cheryl." Adam wrapped his arm around Geraldine, "We wanted to honor Kim's friend Cheryl."_

" _You did, Son." Bob chimed in, "it's a beautiful name for a beautiful girl."_

 _Kim grabbed a tissue, "Mommy you're crying? Are you sad?" Sebastian looked up at her._

" _No, baby." She smiled, "I'm happy, really happy."_

" _Me too." Sebastian agreed, "I love AhLila"_

" _Delilah, Man." Adam corrected his son, he took his daughter from Geraldine and sat at the foot of Kim's bed._

" _I know. That's what I said." Sebastian._

Kim had enjoyed every second of the last four months, although the three am feeds just may have been one of the rare moments she didn't enjoy.

Even know as she waited for the bottle to be warmed she couldn't help but smile despite it being before dawn.

"Shh..Lila girl, it's almost done." Kim swayed from side to side in a desperate attempt to keep the baby from waking the entire house up.

Sebastian had been unable to pronounce Delilah which had been a bit baffling since he could rattle off the names of dinosaurs with ease, but his sister's name tripped him up. Eventually they gave up correcting him, and started calling Delilah, Lila.

Though Adam alternated between Lady and Lila, Lady seemed to be his preferred name for her and it was adorable.

Sebastian was his Man and Delilah his Lady.

"Hey.." Adam grunted as he made his way into the kitchen, "She Okay?"

"Yes." Kim leaned back into his chest as he embraced her from behind, "Patience isn't her strong suit." Once she checked the temp of the formula she slipped the nipple into Lila's mouth, "you should go back to bed..we're good."

Adam kissed the back of her head, "I want to be with my girls."

They sat in near silence as Lila drank her bottle.

They never had the quiet moments when Sebastian was an infant, they didn't get to watch him as he slept, or sit together exhausted beyond words but happy as could be. They had missed out on so many of the little moments with Sebastian. They wouldn't let a single moment with Lila pass them by, they wanted to celebrate every milestone no matter how mundane it was.

As Adam lifted her to his shoulder to burp her, Kim felt her eyes fill with tears and she was powerless to stop them from running down her cheeks.

"Darlin', why are you crying?"

Kim laughed softly, "Its been like night and day. Sebastian's birth and the months afterward were so hard on us all, but for Lila it's been so easy. I hate that everything was so hard for Sebastian. He never got this as a baby and that breaks my heart, he deserved to have this."

"He has it, Kim. He is loved beyond words and is happy and healthy."

"I love you. You're an amazing daddy, I'm forever grateful that we found our way back together and that we have our beautiful son and daughter."

"I love you too, baby."

 _ **First off, I apologize for this half assed attempt at an ending but I've struggled with finishing this one off, it was meant to be my last 'happy' Burzek story and I've had a serious lack of motivation in finishing it. I didn't want to not finish it but I just couldn't get it together. I've lost almost all interest in the show and that makes me sad. It was my favorite show to watch every week but I just can't bring myself to watch it. It's more that just the pairing of Ruzek and Upton but that's a large chunk of it.**_

 _ **Thanks for reading my stories and leaving the kind reviews**_.


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